Resources for caretakers and supports of those with Eating Disorders
10/16/25 | By: Mary Blair Holden
Supporting a loved one through an eating disorder can be a daunting task. I hear many supports say that they are afraid of saying the wrong thing, leading them to say nothing. Eating disorders are complex disorders that are not rational and can be difficult to understand. In her book Life Without ED Jenny Schaffer says “From the outside looking in, you can't understand it. From the inside looking out, you can't explain it.” She then goes on to say “People don't have to understand us. We just need them to believe us.”
For Parents:
Having your child struggle with any physical or mental health concern is unbelievably frightening. When we have children, our hearts exist outside our bodies. Many times, parents take on self-blame and responsibility for anything that happens to their children. Parents are not (most of the time) to blame for the development of eating disorders, but their support can make one of the biggest impacts.
The National Eating Disorder Association’s parent guide is a great first resource. This guide is a comprehensive overview of eating disorders, discussing diagnosis, treatment, and common misconceptions. This guide also discusses types of support and how to assist your child through treatment.
https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/sites/default/files/Toolkits/ParentToolkit.pdf
When Your Teen Has an Eating Disorder: Practical Strategies to Help Your Teen Recover from Anorexia, Bulimia & Binge Eating- Lauren Muhlheim, PsyD.
This book provides more in-depth information about eating disorders and how to support your child. This book takes a Maudsley Therapy approach, often known as Family-Based Treatment. This book is going to be more applicable to children and teens who are still living at home under their parents’ daily care.
https://www.amazon.com/When-Your-Teen-Eating-Disorder/dp/1684030439
ARFID/ picky eating specific: Has your child been diagnosed with Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID) or struggle with highly picky and selective eating? Parent resources for eating disorders are often geared more towards anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa. ARFID takes on a different presentation than these other eating disorders, and support often looks different. Rachel Bryant-Waugh’s guide is a good first resource to learn more about this lesser-discussed eating disorder.
For Additional book recommendations and more in-depth reviews,, visit our blog “Essential Books for Parents & Caregivers of Teens with Eating Disorders” https://www.monarchwellness.com/blog/books-for-parents-caregivers-teens-eating-disorders-recovery
Adult Romantic partners:
Resources for supporting those with eating disorders are often geared towards parents, especially parents of teens. This can further reinforce the stereotype that eating disorders only exist in teens. The type of support that a romantic partner is going to give to their adult loved one will and should look different than that of a parent to a child.
Dr. Dana Harron’s book Loving Someone with an Eating Disorder guides how to provide support to a romantic partner without becoming parentified. Dr Harron’s book discusses topics that are specific to adult partners, including intimacy. She validates the impact eating disorders have on a romantic relationship while also providing hope for positive change through treatment.
Podcast:
Being a caretaker or support person of someone with an eating disorder is not only frightening but can also feel extremely isolating. Eating Disorders impact everyone in their orbit. In this podcast, Eva Musby and Tabitha Farrar discuss the support person’s experience and the importance of the support person finding support themselves through both stress management skills and learning practical skills to assist in the ED sufferers’ treatment.
The Surprising Truth About Care For Parents and Partners: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/eva-musby-on-the-surprising-truth-about-care-for/id1138563928?i=1000389529074
Due to the impact of our society’s focus on body image, many individuals hold unconscious bias around weight and misguided beliefs about food and dieting. Whether you are a clinician, parent, partner, friend, or other type of support person, it is important to explore your own relationship with food and body image to provide the best support. The beliefs you hold and comments that you might unintentionally make could negatively impact your loved one’s recovery or their comfort in going to you for support. Here are book recommendations to assist in examining your own relationship with food and body image:
The Body is not an Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor
More than a Body by Lexie Kite and Lindsay Kite
The Anti-Diet by Chisty Harrison
Intuitive Eating by Elyse Resch and Evelyn Tribole
At Monarch Wellness and Psychotherapy we work with individuals, families, and couples. We are currently offering a free support group for caregivers of loved ones struggling with a mental health disorder.
If you want to learn more about this group offering or our other therapy services contact us at: reachout@monarchwellness.com