Signs Your Drinking May Be a Problem
April 14, 2025 | By Dana Harron
1. You Are Uncomfortable in Situations Where Alcohol Isn’t Served
When you are looking for a dinner out with friends, one of the first things you think about is whether or not there might be alcohol available. These issues can often go hand in hand with social anxiety. It can seem as though alcohol will act like a social lubricant. The reality, though, is that your anxiety is increased overall – hello, hangxiety.
2. You Say You Will Drink Less, but You Don’t
Making promises to yourself or others about changing your drinking habits and then having trouble following through is a sign that drinking has taken on a bit of a life of its own. It isn’t that you don’t really mean what you say when you are making the promise, just that your fortitude wanes when the situation changes. A Monarch therapist can help you to build the skills to keep your promises to yourself.
3. You Feel Shame When You Think About Your Drinking
If you get a pit in your stomach when you are thinking about your alcohol use, that’s one indication that things aren’t working for you right now. If you find yourself trying to hide how much or what you are drinking from other people, that is a sign that you don’t feel comfortable with your behavior. The shame can even make people drink more, because then they don’t pay attention to that terrible feeling.
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4. You Drink in Risky Situations
Have you ever gotten behind the wheel after a drink or two? Have you ever had a drink or two knowing that the likelihood of having to drive was fairly high, like visiting a restaurant? This is a more common issue than many people think and many people feel terribly when they look clearly at this behavior. But they may lack the skills to actually create new ways of doing things without assistance.
5. Your Partner or Friends Have Expressed Concern
Sure, sometimes somebody’s concern might outweigh the situation. But if more than one person has expressed a concern about your drinking, or if a person who knows you very well has said that they are worried, this is a time to take heed.
6. You’ve Done Things You Regret While Drunk
When we drink our behavior becomes uninhibited. This means that sometimes we can do or say things that we wish we hadn’t. The more frequently we drink, and the more drunk we get during this time, the more likely this is to happen.
7. You Miss Events for Drinking
Nobody wants to show up for yoga class drunk, that would be weird. But…have you ever decided maybe I’ll just skip this one so that I can have a glass or two (or three?) of wine tonight? This can contribute to a pattern of isolating (because you have to do that in order to hide your drinking from others). Having to miss events because of hangovers counts too.
8. You Prefer Drinking Friends to Non-Drinking Friends
When you hear someone doesn’t drink, do you wonder in the back of your head how you could be friends? What would you do together? Does it feel like it would be hard to picture having a good time with them? All of these are indicators that maybe alcohol drives more of your decision-making than you would wish.
How to Get Help for Limiting or Quitting Drinking
The first thing that people think of when they are thinking of changing their drinking is Alcoholics Anonymous. This is a wonderful organization who undoubtedly has helped many people – for more on this and other 12 step programs.
It’s also important to know that abstinence isn’t the only legitimate decision. Working with a moderation management or harm-reduction therapist can help you to address your relationship with alcohol in a supportive and non-judgmental setting.
People report that successful treatment helps them to reclaim their relationships, reconnect with their sense of integrity, and feel back in charge of when and how they drink. To see if an outpatient moderation management approach or a supported 12-step based approach might be right for you, please feel free to reach out for a free consultation.
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You can also call or text us at 202-656-3681, or email us directly. Give yourself the opportunity for the support you deserve.